A groom usually asks his best and oldest friend or a sibling to be the best man. It is considered a position of honor. He is said to be the third most important person in a wedding, that is, after the bride and groom. The role of the best man is pivotal in ensuring the success of the wedding ceremony. It is his responsibility to make sure that everything runs smoothly and according to plan. He should also lend moral support to the groom in addition to all this. He has to be an integral part of all pre-wedding duties like attending the various events, organizing the bachelor party, attending rehearsal dinners, arranging speeches, and even picking up the groom's formal wear.
Responsibilities of the Best Man
At the Bachelor Party
The bachelor party is said to have its origins in ancient Sparta, in the 5th Century. The idea behind this party is to allow the groom and his male friends one last opportunity to be freewheeling and relive their bachelorhood. The best man has to be very careful in planning it to ensure that it does not turn out to be disastrous. One of his responsibilities is to make sure that people from the groom's as well as the bride's family do not get offended. He should organize the party keeping the groom's interests in mind. It can be a low-key event, with just a casual gathering of the groom's close friends. It should also be ensured that the party does not coincide with any other ceremony or pre-wedding event. The best man does not have to bear all the expenses of the party. They can be shared with the rest of the groomsmen. He can also simplify his work by giving the groomsmen some duties and supervising over them.
At the Rehearsal Dinner
The rehearsal dinner is an informal meal after the wedding rehearsal. The intention of this dinner is to get both the wedding parties acquainted with each other. The groom's mother should traditionally take care of this part, and the groom's family pays for it. However, the recent trend in weddings is for couples to include this cost in the overall budget of the wedding. The rehearsal dinner is usually a relaxed gathering, with the family toasting for the bride and groom. It also gives the couple a chance to thank their near and dear ones. The best man can help in the planning and execution of the rehearsal dinner. He can arrange games like pool, poker, or some other fun indoor games. He can also toast the bride and groom, and give them a gift. Although the best man has to attend all the events, he does not have to bring gifts each time.
At the Wedding
During the ceremony, the best man stands on the right of the groom, and the other groomsmen and ushers next to him. He is supposed to be a close confidante of the groom. Not only does he assist the groom in getting dressed, but he also needs to check on the groomsmen attire. He is in charge of getting the groom to the venue of the ceremony on time. He also carries the wedding ring till the groom exchanges it with the bride. He is the legal witness to the wedding, delivers the officiant's fee, and also supervises the ushers. He oversees the wedding reception to ensure that it goes smoothly. He has to keep a tab on the wedding photographers, music, catering, and most importantly, ensure that the wedding cake arrives on time. After the wedding ceremony, he has to ensure that all the formal wear is returned to the rental shop. If the groom's dress is not rented, then he should see to it that it is cleaned and returned to the groom's house. Lastly, he also arranges the tickets, hotel information, itinerary, and anything else needed for the honeymoon.
- Meticulously plan the bachelor party
- Assist in planning the rehearsal dinner and actively participate in it
- Make sure the groom reaches the venue of the wedding ceremony and reception on time
- Confirm whether the marriage license is ready before the wedding day, and if the officiant is paid
- Make sure that the ushers do their job well, and that the seating arrangement is proper
- Prepare a wedding speech
- Collect money from the groomsmen for the bachelor party, and for the wedding gift, if he is planning on buying a joint one with them
- Dance with the bridesmaids and the bride
- Make sure that the rented wedding attire is duly returned
- Assist in taking the wedding gifts home from the reception venue
- Make sure all the honeymoon arrangements are made